So the conversation is here...

So after having given it some thoughts i have decided to address one issue that just pisses me of (pardon my language) it is a theme that really splits people in two groups - those that have and those that doesnt have, yeah okay then of course there is the one group - those that wants to have...

what am i talking about here.....did you guess it... yes it is kids...those little ones that cannot be re-funded when you get tired of playing mom of dad...okay that wasnt nice! But here is a story that will show you what i am going through with my friends...

So i am a godfather - no not like Brando or Pacino... i have a god daugther and she is wonderful - in portions that is!! - i am a young guy (relatively speaking, turn round this sept. ) but i cannot see myself with kids, i do not in my wildest dreams imagine myself with small kids on the arm, smelling, drowling and whatever it is that they do... okay - so i know that i dont like kids, i know that i dont want kids, i know that i would most likely stink as a father - but does that make me a bad person....? no it just makes me a person that doesnt want that sort of responsibility and commitment - i am free, free like the wind..(am i overdoing it here...) i dont want seriously to be a father!!

for that part my partner is okay with that she has one already, and i would have my doubts that she would want another one....!! but you know what makes me frustrated, it is when my friends are telling me that "you are not complete without kids..." or "your life is without any meaning without kids..." and the list goes on and on and on and on....but here comes my reply, what do you know about my life...i am not saying my life is perfect, but i am thereby as well not saying that there is nissing a kid in my life - just for the fun of it... having a kid for me is a lot of commitment, responsibility and money (here the list goes on as well) it is all about love, about caring, about teaching and learning and and and.... but what if i dont want that, what if i Martin Nielsen choose to live a life without kids - does that mean that my life is empty - because i can only be complete if i have a kid?!

Okay so what is my point, my point is very simple: what makes you satisfied, doesnt neccessary make me satisfied - correct?, so what makes you happy doesnt have to be what makes me happy - correct?! So what on earth makes people believe that only by getting a kid can i be complete or happy or..... this is complete rubbish!!

i am happy for those of you that have kids, i am happy for my friends that have kids, but please next time i come around - dont start to push kids on to me....and please dont start to talk to me about how much a kid is missing in my life...and how great my life would be if i had a kid -- i am not like you... getting a kid is not something i plan to do....

yes here comes the smart reader - what if your partner wants another one... point taken, my answer not with me!

oh and here comes the even smarter reader - but you dont know what the situation will be like 5 years from now - Correct Einstein and neither do you, so yes i migth be worong, i migth change my opinion - but it is my life, so i am allowed to do that... but i dont need anybody to tell me that i should - it has to come naturally, if it indeed comes...

so salude and long live the free men....

Your comments.... is my pleasure

Okay one more thing before i leave for the day - i want to thank those of you that have send me comments, i will never forget that - i am humble in your presences... your words keeps me motivated... you keep me going..

... so feel free to drop me a line - advice, suggestions, opinions whatever it is, feel free to send it..

your comments are my motivation...

Thank you....you know who you are

Alive and kicking....

Boys and girls, ladies and gentlemen.... he is alive and well, yes it is me...I am back stronger (well not really - it just sounds cool) and better than ever! Almost a million years has pasted by since my last post, and with all the positive feedback that i have gotten from you guys i have decided to start again... No honestly, i have been in a deep dark hole of my life..depressions, lack of confidence, more depressions a lot of insecurity, a lot of questions... and a ton of sleepless night..a lot of crying missing my family, my friends back home, really bad depressions - but you know what, i lived through it - i was in the eye of the storm and came out on the other side, i feel happy again, i feel alive, i feel there is a reason for waking up - but most of all i feel that there is a reason to smile and to live!

Okay okay, i guess i will never become this over-optimist but i am happy that i am back.. so to those of you that have supported me during this thunder of my life - thank you! so what did i actually get out of my depression - well a weight loose is one thing, a super reflection over my current state of my life is another thing, and you know what, i am happy that i went through this period of my life...self-reflection is the most powerful tool for future development! - did you reflect over your life lately, "are you happy with you?" if not i suggest that you start to change something - and trust me you can teach an old dog new tricks...- just look at me :-)

Okay so i am back, i am alive and i am well, i have a reason to wake up in the morning, the sun is shinning - but you know what i have learned, no matter how down you are - you yourself have the power (and it is really power!) to make it back to the top again..it doesnt have to be dark and cold, it can be sunny and fun again..you are the master of your life, i believe in you, i know that you can do it.. i keep my fingers crossed for you..let us smile and be happy again, and let the dark times be the past..

Wow there are so many things that has changed - so many things that i want to share with you - so many things i want you to be part of...but for now - thank you for being here for me when i needed you the most! - this i will never forget!

So my friends - spread the word, Martin is back - and this time around it will be for good... i am not leaving you!

My angels - i found my way back home...

Something that i just have to share with you..

So i was sitting in the bus just a couple of hours ago, going home from work, it has been a very stressful day, so looking forward to get home, eat something, be with my better half..so sitting in the bus minding my own business, in enters this old man, i know him from when i go to work, he is homeless, selling magazins to people on the stress..it looks like the weather already is getting the better of him, his cloth is torn, didnt have a shower or a shave for to long a time - i wonder when the last time was, when he had a full stomach, and a nice bed to sleep in.. so he enters the bus, and rigth away the busdriver comes - "get out of my bus, you are not allowed to sell magazins in my bus.." - i mean what is wrong with this person (if i can call him that - rather call him a primitive subject!), the old man is speechless, doesnt put up a figth, to many situations like this, to many people not wanting to know of him, to many times been told that he is not wanted, the man is helpless, and then it comes, the bus driver continues to shout at this old helpless man.. and the one young guy stands up for the old man - "who the hell do you think that you are", a older lady starts "he is really not doing anything wrong.." and after a bit of time the whole bus stands up for this old man, and the bus driver finally crawls back to his hole and drives on...

the face expression of this old man, if full of thankfullness, full of hope, full of humbleness, full of love, and at the same time grief, lost, lack of motivation, lack of life, lack of everything that is connected with hope.. but still he has the power to whisper a small "dakujem" (slovak for thank you..)..the old man is out on the street every morning from 6 in the morning - to 20 in the evening...regardless of the weather, he doesnt have anything, maybe he lost everything, maybe he gave up he previous life, but he is still figthing...every day figthing..he is figthing more than other people that i know of...he has nothing - they have everything..what is the world come to..

i will tell you what i felt, what i saw, i saw humanity, i saw love, tolenrance, acceptance, and respect..all of this for a person that couldnt defend himself..other people helping, people coming together... this gives me hope that there is something better in everybody - except people like this primitive subject...so when people that you cant make a difference - tell them to go to hell, one man, can make a difference..if only he believes that he can..

sometimes you have a choice to help people that cant help themselves, it is your choice, make sure you choose the right thing to do...wouldnt it be wonderful to change - help change the world..imagine that everybody would start to help and support each other like this young man..then the world would be a better place..is it all just a dream, today i saw something more than a dream, reality..so sometimes dreams do come true..

so till our next time, the rigth way is not always the easy way, buy for sure after all the best way..

My sincere apologizes..

Ladies & Gentlemen, friends...

i sincerely apologize for not posting anything on my blog for the last period of time, however several things has happened.. and once i get the time i will share it all with you, dont worry... but for now, i need to apologize for my lack time, and trust me it is not lack of commitment..

once again my dear friends please feel free to check back once in a while for updates, i promise my updates will come very soon...oh and by the way i am going to do a conference this weekend - so that will for sure give me some more input...

so till our next time, start to prepare for a lot of reading..

yours commited...

Just wanted to share something with you...

dear friends on a day like today, where everything is going this fast, i just wanted to share something that i just read, and it really impressed me...have a look:

"Do you know how to give folks what they most, most, most want from you, without even asking them what it is?In all regards, just be yourself. That's what they were after when they manifested you into their lives. I recieved this and like to share.Being yourself is a great gift, first of all for yourself, and ... also for the others..."

how true and simple...

Reflection time is coming to town..

Why is is that everybody thinks that christmas time is the time for the big reflection - where the big questions are to be answered, questions like "what have i achieved this year?" or "what do i want to achieve next year?".. i mean why is it that these questions only comes once a year? i am in the (un)lucky situation that i have these questions on a weekly basis..i do a lot of conferences, i did a lot of conferences in the past as well, and what of the things that i have learned is to ask these types of questions all the time - i use it for personal development..i mean without this, nothing will happen, so forget what you think you know, forget what you have heard, forget who you are now and start to focus on who you want to be or what you want to become - focus on what you want to know..for me this includes setting monthly / sometimes weekly goals, and follow up on these goals.. in the end is there anything better than to develop yourself, is there anything better than when your family / friends / colleagues comes up to you, to tell you that you have changed into something better, something more!! for me this is the best felling!! but it all starts before that, forgetting about your previous situation - to become something more can only - will only happen once you really knows who you are, only after this can you become something more, something better..

so how do i do it? well it is pretty smple, i have always been facinated with knowledge, and learning new things / or getting to know new people, for me this is the ultimate goal in my life, being rich and famous is good and everything, but by the end of the day not really for me! for me the best way of developing is through mentorship, so i have a mentor(s) at work, these are as well by many people called go-to-colleagues, i have a mentor for my personal life, and i have a mentor for my coaching and presentation skills.. personally i started working with mentors when i was 18 yrs. old and ever since then i have been changing mentors, developing, changing mentors, learning, developing and changing mentors, i must have had the first 15 mentors till today! i have been a lucky person because all of these mentors that i have had, have all give something that i didnt know, so answers to my questions, on new ways of thinking, or totally new knowledge...this has allowed me to become in my own eyes a more complex person! (okay, i am not saying that i am god, or the best person, but i can honestly say that without a mentor my life would have been looking alot different!!)... So the first thing you should keep in mind when working with a mentor is : getting along and go along...! so what does this mean, well i have been in the situation many times that i have been eager to learn, sometimes to eager that i have not listen to my mentor, arguing with my mentor, or simply fighthing with my mentor, looking back on it - i know that it was a mistake... this is the "get along" phase, working with a mentor takes a lot of respect from your side, because you need to "shut up and listen" regardless of you agreeing or not, nobody wants a mentee that is loud mouth-arrogant and cant listen, so listen and learn, it takes time to learn to listen, alot of time, once you can listen, then you can learn, and now you are getting along... going along pretty much means that you have shown your abilities to listen even when something negative is being said about you (negative in my eyes is a matter of definetion - because what does it mean, many people take negative feedback extremely bad - i dont care as long as it is objective, subjective feedback doesnt help me what soever - sentences like "you are stupide!" - what can i use it for, argue for why you think i am stupide and i will consider it).. so the getting along phase for me is where your mentor takes you into his / her life, shows you all the ups and downs, explains you the differences between left and rigth, shares his or her knowledge / experience with you..once again a mentor doesnt what to hear that you think it could be done in a better way, or you think that it is stupide this way, once you are able to do it yourself then you can choose for yourself - till then listen, learn and be quiet! what of however happens is that the mentee thinks that it is all going to slow, this can go faster, well it can, but what i always say - back to the basics, you need to understand and know the basic stuff to understand and work with the complex stuff...one without the other cant exist...

the cool thing in my eyes about mentors is that they will go till the end of the world for you - if you show them respect, believe and the want / desire to learn from them, they will open up alot of closed doors for you, because when you start in a new company, community, etc. your mentor will be the gatemaster...and the fantastic thing about it is - they only want you to remember then in the future when you are becoming famous and rich...they will not ask for money, they only want to be remembered...this is a price that i am willing and able to pay, are you???

so for me life without a mentor is like life without guidance, you may think that you can learn everything on your own, only to wake up and realizing that for the last 2 yrs you have been trying to change into something better, but due to lack of guidance you acutally turned into something worse...that is pretty stupide, so dont think you know everything, find a mentor, learn from him or her, develop, move on to a new mentor, and repeat the process, this will for sure help you be more than you have ever been before...see the wonderfull thing about mentorship is that now - i am 29 yrs old, and i get to stand in front of people taking to them about this issue, now that is cool, i get the chance to tell people how their life can become better by working with a mentor..isnt life super....i have a conference coming in 2 weeks time, for a bounch of young people where i will be talking about the exact topic - "mentorship and the reason for it.." so in two weeks time i will update you a bit more on this topic okay!

till then - life is a learning process, so if you dont like to study - you are totally lost! so open the books and get cracking....