So the conversation is here...

So after having given it some thoughts i have decided to address one issue that just pisses me of (pardon my language) it is a theme that really splits people in two groups - those that have and those that doesnt have, yeah okay then of course there is the one group - those that wants to have...

what am i talking about here.....did you guess it... yes it is kids...those little ones that cannot be re-funded when you get tired of playing mom of dad...okay that wasnt nice! But here is a story that will show you what i am going through with my friends...

So i am a godfather - no not like Brando or Pacino... i have a god daugther and she is wonderful - in portions that is!! - i am a young guy (relatively speaking, turn round this sept. ) but i cannot see myself with kids, i do not in my wildest dreams imagine myself with small kids on the arm, smelling, drowling and whatever it is that they do... okay - so i know that i dont like kids, i know that i dont want kids, i know that i would most likely stink as a father - but does that make me a bad person....? no it just makes me a person that doesnt want that sort of responsibility and commitment - i am free, free like the wind..(am i overdoing it here...) i dont want seriously to be a father!!

for that part my partner is okay with that she has one already, and i would have my doubts that she would want another one....!! but you know what makes me frustrated, it is when my friends are telling me that "you are not complete without kids..." or "your life is without any meaning without kids..." and the list goes on and on and on and on....but here comes my reply, what do you know about my life...i am not saying my life is perfect, but i am thereby as well not saying that there is nissing a kid in my life - just for the fun of it... having a kid for me is a lot of commitment, responsibility and money (here the list goes on as well) it is all about love, about caring, about teaching and learning and and and.... but what if i dont want that, what if i Martin Nielsen choose to live a life without kids - does that mean that my life is empty - because i can only be complete if i have a kid?!

Okay so what is my point, my point is very simple: what makes you satisfied, doesnt neccessary make me satisfied - correct?, so what makes you happy doesnt have to be what makes me happy - correct?! So what on earth makes people believe that only by getting a kid can i be complete or happy or..... this is complete rubbish!!

i am happy for those of you that have kids, i am happy for my friends that have kids, but please next time i come around - dont start to push kids on to me....and please dont start to talk to me about how much a kid is missing in my life...and how great my life would be if i had a kid -- i am not like you... getting a kid is not something i plan to do....

yes here comes the smart reader - what if your partner wants another one... point taken, my answer not with me!

oh and here comes the even smarter reader - but you dont know what the situation will be like 5 years from now - Correct Einstein and neither do you, so yes i migth be worong, i migth change my opinion - but it is my life, so i am allowed to do that... but i dont need anybody to tell me that i should - it has to come naturally, if it indeed comes...

so salude and long live the free men....

Your comments.... is my pleasure

Okay one more thing before i leave for the day - i want to thank those of you that have send me comments, i will never forget that - i am humble in your presences... your words keeps me motivated... you keep me going..

... so feel free to drop me a line - advice, suggestions, opinions whatever it is, feel free to send it..

your comments are my motivation...

Thank you....you know who you are

Alive and kicking....

Boys and girls, ladies and gentlemen.... he is alive and well, yes it is me...I am back stronger (well not really - it just sounds cool) and better than ever! Almost a million years has pasted by since my last post, and with all the positive feedback that i have gotten from you guys i have decided to start again... No honestly, i have been in a deep dark hole of my life..depressions, lack of confidence, more depressions a lot of insecurity, a lot of questions... and a ton of sleepless night..a lot of crying missing my family, my friends back home, really bad depressions - but you know what, i lived through it - i was in the eye of the storm and came out on the other side, i feel happy again, i feel alive, i feel there is a reason for waking up - but most of all i feel that there is a reason to smile and to live!

Okay okay, i guess i will never become this over-optimist but i am happy that i am back.. so to those of you that have supported me during this thunder of my life - thank you! so what did i actually get out of my depression - well a weight loose is one thing, a super reflection over my current state of my life is another thing, and you know what, i am happy that i went through this period of my life...self-reflection is the most powerful tool for future development! - did you reflect over your life lately, "are you happy with you?" if not i suggest that you start to change something - and trust me you can teach an old dog new tricks...- just look at me :-)

Okay so i am back, i am alive and i am well, i have a reason to wake up in the morning, the sun is shinning - but you know what i have learned, no matter how down you are - you yourself have the power (and it is really power!) to make it back to the top again..it doesnt have to be dark and cold, it can be sunny and fun again..you are the master of your life, i believe in you, i know that you can do it.. i keep my fingers crossed for you..let us smile and be happy again, and let the dark times be the past..

Wow there are so many things that has changed - so many things that i want to share with you - so many things i want you to be part of...but for now - thank you for being here for me when i needed you the most! - this i will never forget!

So my friends - spread the word, Martin is back - and this time around it will be for good... i am not leaving you!

My angels - i found my way back home...